As I get more accustomed to my life with BPD I realize that for me less is more. I enjoy life so much more when I do less. It isn't always easy with a toddler. From Thanksgiving to New Year's Eve it is VERY hard to make that happen. Stressors holiday and non-holiday in nature come from everywhere. On both G and my side of our families there is drama/crisis. It is not important what each family is dealing with - it is there. Both of these situation do not directly affect our families, but each effects our emotions and relationships. I am so thankful that over the last two days neither situation has interfered with celebrating Christmas. Christmas is not a day for dealing with situations. It was my hope that with both families we could enjoy being together and cherishing the day. Life can be dealt with another day and in its own time.
One thing that we do to help keep holidays manageable for me is to only go to one place a day. Many people try to goto multiple homes during the day. This just doesn't work for me and so we keep it to one. In general life works better if I would remember to do that through out the year. Yesterday we did my home with my family and two friend-families. Today we spent our traditional morning at home then headed to G's parents. In the next week we have three family members coming from out of town and the annual Christmas party of our "musical lovers anonymous" group. It has neatly worked out that each person/group gets their own day. Tomorrow I pick up my brother from the airport (after early morning shopping), Saturday is our Christmas party, Sunday we'll go to Papa's church with our niece. Monday is for errands and taking my brother back to the airport. Tuesday we are going to a Children's museum with the niece, Wednesday is our Settlers of Catan New Year's Eve party, Thurs is Papa's birthday and BB is spending the night over there with her cousin and I'll meet them at the airport to see the niece off and pick up Bekah. My other brother comes in and I'll see him Friday.
This Monday coming up I have another med check appointment. I don't have alot to go over with the doctor. Not much has changed and I have been handling my illness well. I have gone off Ambien which I miss at times, but it is one thing that I won't take when I get pregnant so I'm going off it now. Sleep is a big thing and with the holidays my schedule is definitely off. I'll sleep after the new year begins.
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I really liked the way you describe pacing yourself through the holidays. It is very helpful to recognize that you can't change some of the family drama, but you can pace yourself as you connect with your family members. I am glad you found "Break the Bipolar Cycle" useful.
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